Spending time on the lake gives you plenty of time to rest and relax. Or, you can annoy your best friend with a groaner or two. Stock up on awesome fishing jokes for “reel” fun.
Fishing Jokes for Dads
Dad jokes and fishing are inseparable. Make your family dread asking you about your day.
- “Get any bites?” “Yeah, at least 20. They were all mosquitos, though.”
- A woman threw a bottle of omega-3 supplements at her husband. Fortunately, he only ended up with super fish oil injuries.
- What do you call canned fish in Russia? Tsardines.
- How many times can a man miss his anniversary to go fishing before his wife leaves him? I guess I’ll find out tomorrow.
- How many blond fishermen does it take to go ice fishing? Four. Otherwise it takes forever to make the hole large enough for the boat.
Fishing Jokes With a Longer Story
These hilarious jokes take a little time to tell, but the payoff is worth it.
Happily Ever After
Once upon a time, a prince asked a beautiful woman to marry him. She said no. After that, he had to go fishing with other guys, drink lots of beer and fart out loud. He lived happily ever after.
The Voice
A group of ice fishing buddies were hanging out. Drunk, one grabs the augur to make a new hole. As he gets ready, he hears a booming voice from above.
“There are no fish here,” says the thundering voice.
The man looks at his friends, who shrug. He lifts the augur, and again the voice says, “There are no fish here!”
“God? Is that you?” the drunken man asks.
“No. This is the manager of the skating rink.”
Dance Fish
“I went fishing with a DJ once,” Jeff says.
“Sounds like fun,” Jim replies.
“Not really,” Jeff responds. “He kept dropping the bass.”
Dark Jokes About Fishing
If you have “that kind” of sense of humor, you’ll love to shock your family with these doozies.
The Funeral Procession
Adam and Mike are fishing near a bridge. After a while, a funeral procession goes by. As it passes, Mike puts his hat over his heart.
“Wow, that’s really respectful,” Adam quips.
“Well, after 20 years of marriage, I figure she deserves it,” Mike responds.
Splashing
Carl is sitting on the dock, trying to fish. Nearby, another guy keeps looking at him, yelling and splashing water on him.
“Dude, I only get Sunday to fish, can you please shut up?”
“I’m drowning!” answers the man.
“You’re also scaring all the fish away,” Carl replies.
The Mother-in-Law
Two buddies are fishing in a boat when one points to the river bank. “Isn’t that your mother-in-law?” he asks.
“Hmm. You’re right,” the other one says.
“Looks like she’s surrounded by crocodiles,” the buddy comments.
“Hmm. You’re right.”
“Don’t you want to help?” the buddy asks.
“And risk getting hurt? No thanks. Those crocodiles got themselves into it. They can get themselves out.”
Share Your Favorite Fishing Jokes
Fishing is all about good times with good friends. Feel like sharing your super-secret stories or fishing jokes? Drop us a line right away.